The Keep's own Mary Sue checklist [Alpha 1.7]: "Can I play, Daddy?" scoring

[Kaz]

Ooh, yee. Figured I'd do this too. Lets see!

Kaz...


-is a demon (Hellhound)
-is anywhere from centuries to thousands of years old (301 years old)
-is withdrawn and quiet; antisocial, often meant to be mysterious
-has your own personality or something nearly identical to it (Here and there)
-has a mental disorder
-appears to be an age which they actually are not
-is notably attractive; beautiful, shapely, well-built, etcetera
-has eyes of an unusual color

-has blue or green eyes. (Though an odd green, hence the above)

-has deceased parents
-lived out on the streets
-became a slave at some point
-has a rough history they don't like to talk about
-has died and returned to life
-has eyes that glow
-has a spirit, consciousness, or other entity which shares their body or mind (His brothers live inside his mind)
-can transform or has an alternate form
-has a cool car, cool bike, or other badass vehicle

17!

Now for redeemer points;

-is some sort of cryptid or supernatural being which adheres to its respective folklore (Demon.. holy water/stuff ectect)
-is a member of a race which you created yourself, though the race is subject to standards and must prove not to be mary sue-y itself
-looks 30 or older; an adult or elderly person
-ages in accordance with the passage of real time
-has a mental disability which genuinely inhibits them in some way, is played out accurately and used as more than a fast and easy way to try and add interesting quirks or features to a personality.
-has a phobia that meets all of the criteria outlined for mental disabilities
-has facades or fronts the player knowingly uses; the character itself tries to act or look a certain way, rather than the player trying to force that perception on other characters.
-has an ideology, beliefs or interests which are notably different than the player's, portrayed without bias; trait of good roleplaying/writing (Player is certainly not racist... XD)
-is described as plain or average; may be somewhat cute or charming
-works at a convenience store, or virtually any other mundane, possibly unappealing job
-has a physical/physiological disability, such as a bad knee, blindness, an amputated limb, weak immune system, etcetera, which is not easily compensated for by another trait or power/ability. (Huuurp. Bad knee..)


11!

Soo~

 17

-11
_____
  6

:O


Now for the bonus round...

-contains song lyrics or poetry. If that's all, it's not too long and decidedly pertains to the character, it's probably alright. (Not sure if I should really add a point. It's not excessive and I think it pertains well.)


So! 4-8 points: You uh, you should probably look something over.

Not too shabby if I do say so myself. :0

[Lurkage]

Jason-

-is in their teens to twenties*
*Age is relative to your character's race. Take this if they're the equivalent.
-is supposed to be a cunning manipulator (typically female)
-puts on a facade of innocence regularly; often to hide the above option
-is notably attractive; beautiful, shapely, well-built, etcetera
-has eyes of an unusual color*
-has deceased parents
-has one or more elementally themed powers (fire, ice, water, darkness, etcetera)
-has healing powers; often female (Not very good healing. So, half a point?)
-can transform or has an alternate form
-is psionic

10 and a half. XD

--Redeemers.

-is some sort of cryptid or supernatural being which adheres to its respective folklore (i.e. a vampire weak to christian symbols)
-is a member of a race which you created yourself, though the race is subject to standards and must prove not to be mary sue-y itself
 -has a mental disability which genuinely inhibits them in some way, is played out accurately and used as more than a fast and easy way to try and add interesting quirks or features to a personality
-has a phobia that meets all of the criteria outlined for mental disabilities
-has facades or fronts the player knowingly uses; the character itself tries to act or look a certain way, rather than the player trying to force that perception on other characters (such as in 'seems tough ...' under personality cliches)
-has an ideology, beliefs or interests which are notably different than the player's, portrayed without bias; trait of good roleplaying/writing
-wears armor/clothing that covers the midriff, chest, thighs etcetera
*powers*-derives them from or explains them using a thought-out/researched, real world/fictional system of beliefs or mechanics
-avoids or genuinely dislikes using them
-receives injury or trauma from using them, which is at or can reach dangerous levels
-received training over an appropriate period of time for their skills from a mentor, academy, etcetera
-has a first aid kit, or some sort of medical supplies in lieu of healing abilities or access thereto
-has mace/pepper spray, a taser, or some similar item for self defense
-has a currency balance you keep track of
-uses a bicycle for transport, or has a vehicle which is not especially fancy or cool
-has a physical/physiological disability, such as a bad knee, blindness, an amputated limb, weak immune system, etcetera, which is not easily compensated for by another trait or power/ability. (Bad hip~! yay!)

-has healing powers; often female (Not very good healing. So, half a point?) Done in accordance with his race. So -1 according to -one or more of the cliches or redeemers are intentionally ridiculous or silly, or made fun of by the player. It's easy to overdo this, but the idea is that the character is still serious enough to be playable. You may take this multiple times, for whatever it applies to.

Minus 6 and a half. XD  -3-(-6) points: Better job.

Profile -
-contains song lyrics or poetry. If that's all, it's not too long and decidedly pertains to the character, it's probably alright. (No point)



Joshua

-seems tough, mysterious, cool, intimidating, or something which would otherwise make your character look good, strong, etcetera
-is withdrawn and quiet; antisocial, often meant to be mysterious
-is calm, collected, and calculating
-has a mental disorder
-is notably attractive; beautiful, shapely, well-built, etcetera
-is frightening or intimidating (not necessarily ugly), or can be easily
-has eyes of an unusual color*
-has blue or green eyes; you do not actually take a point for this, as it's odd to have to justify it. It is very common, though, so note it.
-has deceased parents (Well, one is dead, so HALF a point.)
-came from a wealthy or high-class home
-was a sadistic or otherwise evil child; 2 points if they killed their parents, a sibling, etcetera (Extremely hard to manage and a bit off, but not evil or sadistic, sooo.. Ha;f a point.)
-has died and returned to life
-has eyes that change colors; 2 points if corresponding to mood or emotion
-is some sort of genius or prodigy; abnormally skilled or talented
-has a spirit, consciousness, or other entity which shares their body or mind
-is more intelligent or capable than an average member of their race
-has considerable skills (robotics, medicine, basket-weaving, arcane ritual) or better
-has a firearm or several (often extensively detailed); 2 points for desert eagles
-has a cool car, cool bike, or other badass vehicle

17

---Redeemers.

-is some sort of cryptid or supernatural being which adheres to its respective folklore (i.e. a vampire weak to christian symbols)
-looks 30 or older; an adult or elderly person
-ages in accordance with the passage of real time
-has a mental disability which genuinely inhibits them in some way, is played out accurately and used as more than a fast and easy way to try and add interesting quirks or features to a personality
-has a phobia that meets all of the criteria outlined for mental disabilities
-has facades or fronts the player knowingly uses; the character itself tries to act or look a certain way, rather than the player trying to force that perception on other characters (such as in 'seems tough ...' under personality cliches)
-has an ideology, beliefs or interests which are notably different than the player's, portrayed without bias; trait of good roleplaying/writing
-wears armor/clothing that covers the midriff, chest, thighs etcetera
-derives them from or explains them using a thought-out/researched, real world/fictional system of beliefs or mechanics
-avoids or genuinely dislikes using them
-receives injury or trauma from using them, which is at or can reach dangerous levels
-received training over an appropriate period of time for their skills from a mentor, academy, etcetera
-has a first aid kit, or some sort of medical supplies in lieu of healing abilities or access thereto
-has mace/pepper spray, a taser, or some similar item for self defense
-has a currency balance you keep track of
-has a physical/physiological disability, such as a bad knee, blindness, an amputated limb, weak immune system, etcetera, which is not easily compensated for by another trait or power/ability. (Back back, bad wrist.)

Profile - -contains song lyrics or poetry. If that's all, it's not too long and decidedly pertains to the character, it's probably alright. (No point.)

total 1  1-3 points: Unless your character only has very few overall list items, don't sweat it. You're dandy.




Oh ...well.. didn't see THAT one coming from a mile away -coughs-

Can I have the towel with the butterflies on it?

Seriously, a MILE.